[I was unaware of this male-to-male sex among the Blacks on this scale. I wonder if this is also not helping to further propagate AIDS? I am going to post another news item: Do Black African sexual practises contribute to the spread of AIDS?” I will post it shortly. Jan]

“The Constitution has helped create a climate in which people can explore their sexuality”

FORGET about the other woman — a fair number of married men in South Africa are getting their kicks in secret with other men.

Jay Matlou does not date married men but, as an openly gay man, is often approached by them.

Matlou, who lives in Mamelodi, east of Pretoria, said he even gets offers from family men who have children.

“This is common here in Mamelodi and in other townships like Soweto,” Matlou said.

His friend and colleague, Brian Phetla, also from Mamelodi, said he has even had a marriage proposal from a married man.

According to a recent poll, sex is not unusual between young gay men and married men — and other men who identify themselves as straight.

A survey of 318 men conducted by gay and lesbian health organisation OUT and the Centre for the Study of Aids at the University of Pretoria found that:

26% had sex with straight men; and

19% had sex with married men.

The online survey was conducted among respondents aged between 16 and 35 between December 2004 and January this year.

Director of the Unisa Centre for Applied Psychology, Juan Nel, confirmed that men having sex with men — while not considering themselves gay — seemed relatively widespread in South Africa.

Nel said men having sex with men was common throughout the world but was only now being recognised by policymakers in South Africa.

No reliable statistics about the number of gay or straight men having sex with other men exist in South Africa. However, studies published in the Journal of Homosexuality in the US report that about 15% to 20% of men have experienced some form of sexual encounter with other men.

Glenn de Swardt, health services and research manager for the Triangle Project — a Cape Town-based NGO serving the gay community — said that, based on the country”s latest census, 15% would translate into about 1.8million men having had sex at some point with other men.

“We need to acknowledge the reality of male-on-male sex, which is generally frowned upon,” he said.

Graeme Reid, of Wits University”s Institute for Social and Economic Research, said: “Undoubtedly the Constitution has helped to create a climate in which people are able to explore various aspects of their sexuality without fear of social stigma or legal censure.”

This contrasts with elsewhere in Africa where male-to-male sex is illegal in many countries.

Esau Mathope, the editor of Behind the Mask — an online gay publication aimed at an African readership — said that it was a widespread practice despite this.

Men could have sex with men but choose not to live a gay lifestyle, he said.

Stigma and prejudice has forced men to be clandestine about their habits — and in some cases marriage acts as a mask for their sexuality.

Although most of the men who participated in the survey said they were gay, 9% kept this a secret from their friends.

In another survey conducted among 59 young men in Tshwane townships, 88% described themselves as gay while 9% said they had not told anyone in their community.

Toni Kruger, co-author of the online survey report, said: “We know it is difficult to come out in this society, which is heterosexist and homophobic.

“There is considerable pressure to conform. This is why quite a large number do what is expected and get married and have kids.”

But secret sex between men may increase risky sexual behaviour — and involve them in the risk of spreading HIV, said Mathope.

“Any activity that takes place underground lends itself to dangers.”

De Swardt concurred: “If sexual behaviour is clandestine and takes place in the shadows, people will feel a sense of shame and guilt and may be more likely to take risks.”

The online survey reported that 35% of the respondents had deliberately chosen on occasion to practise unprotected sex.

Of those who did not use condoms, about 40% said they were in monogamous
But Kruger warned that these couples — just like straight couples — seemed to have unrealistic ideas about the safety of their relationships.

Nearly a quarter of them said that they had broken their agreement not to have sex with other men. Eleven percent said they did not have casual sex.

Source: AllAfrica.Com
URL: http://allafrica.com/stories/200506210158.htm…br>